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The Daily Mash
Lidl Christmas advert shows delighted kids opening angle grinders and portable hookah pipes
Yesterday at 4:09 pm
Six duvet days in a row, and other radical self-care steps that take the piss
Yesterday at 1:11 pm
Did you invest in crypto because an influencer told you to, you total bellend?
Yesterday at 12:10 pm
Trump appoints Ram Man to cabinet
November 14, 2024 at 4:16 pm
Can I speak to you about your internet provider? By Mike Tyson
November 14, 2024 at 1:01 pm
Teen worried that ear piercing makes him look a bit straight
November 14, 2024 at 12:08 pm
King gets even older in widely-criticised move
November 14, 2024 at 11:01 am
Bad Enoch, Tony B. Liar, and other political nicknames so cringey they could convince you to switch sides
November 14, 2024 at 10:03 am
Bananarama are old now: How to explain Band Aid without weeping
November 14, 2024 at 9:14 am
Coincidentally, church not popular
November 13, 2024 at 4:13 pm
Why the new presenter of Match of the Day, the head of the Anglican Church and the next James Bond must all be women
November 13, 2024 at 1:19 pm
Homeworker only in office for the biscuits
November 13, 2024 at 12:11 pm
Six pathetic little wins for Britain’s right-wing newspapers
November 13, 2024 at 11:10 am
The seven most infuriating types of climate change denier, ranked
Yesterday at 11:11 am
Snow a lot less f**king wet in the movies
Yesterday at 10:13 am
Farmers’ protest led by most inherently unsympathetic figurehead possible
Yesterday at 9:11 am
Launching a hot sauce, and other half-arsed celebrity cash grabs
November 13, 2024 at 10:12 am
The Trump voter’s guide to coping with buyer’s remorse
November 13, 2024 at 9:11 am
‘I checked with God and he said it was alright’ explains Welby
November 12, 2024 at 4:58 pm
Dark evenings provide perfect opportunity to judge other people’s living rooms
November 12, 2024 at 12:57 pm
‘Thank you for being you’ means he’s ejaculated: your Reply Guy’s messages, decrypted
November 12, 2024 at 11:59 am
Gary Lineker’s reign of terror to end
November 12, 2024 at 11:02 am
Thief Takers, Bonekickers, Grafters: Stupid names for jobs that TV thought were cool
November 12, 2024 at 10:12 am
You’re always welcome with us, Catholic Church tells Welby
November 12, 2024 at 9:00 am
All Jamie Oliver’s offensive books withdrawn from sale
November 11, 2024 at 3:10 pm
Riding the whole Central Line: the ten most dogshit things to do in London
November 11, 2024 at 1:10 pm
Ed Sheeran disbands Gingers for Africa
November 19, 2024 at 4:11 pm
Whole family shamed by child’s snowman
November 19, 2024 at 3:14 pm
‘How did you get that scar?’: A guide for bullshitters
November 19, 2024 at 1:14 pm
The Le Creuset sale, and other middle-class riots waiting to happen
November 11, 2024 at 12:12 pm
Leonardo DiCaprio turns two Leonardo DiCaprio girlfriends years old
November 11, 2024 at 11:13 am
“No-one suffers more from my commitment phobia than I do”
November 11, 2024 at 10:10 am
Six movies retrospectively ruined by Donald Trump cameos
November 11, 2024 at 9:04 am
Cartoons of foxes in waistcoats, and other features of truly characterless gastropubs
November 8, 2024 at 6:28 pm
We ask you: have you even noticed Ireland has called an election?
November 8, 2024 at 6:28 pm
Internet definitely to blame for this but nobody sure quite how
November 8, 2024 at 4:09 pm
Fat people to sue their own sofas
November 8, 2024 at 1:13 pm
Trump administration to give Farage his own kennel
November 8, 2024 at 11:43 am
My year has been so hard it’s been almost like one of yours, says William
November 8, 2024 at 10:11 am
Man blames erectile dysfunction on 20mph speed limit
November 19, 2024 at 12:03 pm
Dune: Prophecy, and six other prequels that prove all prequels are shite
November 19, 2024 at 11:13 am
Woman finds last year’s seasonal depression in winter coat
November 19, 2024 at 10:01 am
Inattentive boyfriend yet to realise he’s in polyamorous relationship
November 8, 2024 at 9:10 am
£100m HS2 bat shed was entirely necessary, says Bruce Wayne
November 7, 2024 at 5:10 pm
Will he be president forever now? Your worst fears about Trump, questioned and confirmed
November 7, 2024 at 1:09 pm
The sound of rutting foxes, and other inappropriate prompts for suggesting sex
November 7, 2024 at 12:11 pm
Seven things Trump claims he will do as president and what he will actually do
November 7, 2024 at 10:56 am
‘Feisty’, and other ways to describe someone when you really want to say ‘f**king annoying’
November 7, 2024 at 10:10 am
Witty signs and polite chanting: the agenda for a liberal Capitol insurrection
November 7, 2024 at 9:09 am
‘A solid excuse for midweek drinking? Don’t mind if I do!’ says Britain
November 6, 2024 at 6:09 pm
Kamala lost because she didn’t have a hat
November 6, 2024 at 5:14 pm
The five stages of Trump grief, for British people
November 6, 2024 at 1:11 pm
Your guide to not letting World War III affect your Christmas plans
November 19, 2024 at 9:11 am
Spray foam insulation ‘fun to do’, installers explain
November 18, 2024 at 6:09 pm
Nine new films that aren’t as good as watching The Matrix again
November 18, 2024 at 12:11 pm
‘Arguments are a sign of a healthy relationship’ says total nightmare couple
November 6, 2024 at 11:58 am
‘Me next,’ says Boris
November 6, 2024 at 11:11 am
Trump urges caution as election may have been rigged
November 6, 2024 at 10:13 am
Laughs ahoy as America re-elects popular comedy president
November 6, 2024 at 9:12 am
Priti Patel back and pathetic like your old school bully
November 5, 2024 at 5:10 pm
Hospital beds, and other places where you could once happily spark up a fag
November 5, 2024 at 1:09 pm
Inside the mind of a British Trump supporter
November 5, 2024 at 12:12 pm
£9,535 a year to doss around and get pissed still pretty good value for money
November 5, 2024 at 11:10 am
Napalm Death, and five other bands who will never be immortalised with a West End musical
November 5, 2024 at 10:11 am
Dogs hate Bonfire Night because they are Guy Fawkes loyalists
November 5, 2024 at 9:11 am
Stop warning us about snow in Britain when you mean Scotland, forecasters told
November 18, 2024 at 11:13 am
Mullet official non-binary haircut
November 18, 2024 at 10:13 am
Ten iconic Premier League managers ranked by what bastards they’d be as father-in-laws
November 18, 2024 at 9:08 am
Farmer celebrates facing ruin for incredible 100th time
November 4, 2024 at 6:11 pm
Tories who hate government and love business asked why they don’t do business then
November 4, 2024 at 3:11 pm
We get just as excited for your by-elections, America tells UK
November 4, 2024 at 1:16 pm
Man and woman who keep seeing each other on dating apps judging each other for it
November 4, 2024 at 12:11 pm
Pretend you’ve never heard of Microsoft Word: how to get out of work tasks, fast
November 4, 2024 at 11:12 am
‘I ate a squirrel and it was beautiful’ says Trump to wild moronic cheers
November 4, 2024 at 10:09 am
My key opponent will be myself, says Badenoch
November 4, 2024 at 9:16 am
Your astrological week ahead for November 2nd, with Psychic Bob
November 1, 2024 at 7:56 pm
We ask you: Would the UK be better off if Guy Fawkes had succeeded in blowing up parliament?
November 1, 2024 at 7:56 pm
Barry Keoghan’s knob to star in Peaky Blinders film but not Barry Keoghan
November 1, 2024 at 3:55 pm
Man enjoying gig still wants it to be over
November 15, 2024 at 5:55 pm
We ask you: what botched cosmetic procedure are you travelling to Turkey for?
November 15, 2024 at 5:55 pm
Why it’s time for Millennials in Need, by Martin Bishop, aged 35
November 15, 2024 at 11:25 am
Connoisseurs of super-strength lager disappointed by Budget
November 1, 2024 at 1:28 pm
Twats convinced everyone will love their f**king massive garden fireworks show
November 1, 2024 at 12:41 pm
Loving text from dad obviously a scam
November 1, 2024 at 11:27 am
Mate refuses to buy round unless it’s in Wetherspoons
November 1, 2024 at 10:12 am
Seven twats who wanked on about being cancelled but are strangely still around
November 1, 2024 at 9:10 am
Tory grassroots unhappy at having to choose between two left-wing leadership candidates
October 31, 2024 at 4:40 pm
Hideous, ghastly apparitions, and that’s just the women: The gammon food critic’s Halloween street party
October 31, 2024 at 1:14 pm
‘I’m a virgin who lives with his parents so I’m better off’: Winners and losers in yesterday’s Budget
October 31, 2024 at 12:26 pm
Pointless bed showroom won’t let you f**k on the mattresses
October 31, 2024 at 11:18 am
The Halloween costumes you can’t make slutty
October 31, 2024 at 9:55 am
We don’t give a f**k about your childhood, celebrities publishing memoirs advised
November 15, 2024 at 10:39 am
Should you try being a fake military veteran? The pros and cons
November 15, 2024 at 9:10 am
Heartwarming John Lewis Christmas ad shows family throwing everything away and buying new stuff
November 14, 2024 at 6:18 pm
Is Poppy Day disrespect starting too early nowadays? By Roy Hobbs
October 31, 2024 at 9:00 am
Higher tax on the wealthy makes man decide not to become a billionaire
October 30, 2024 at 4:12 pm
Little girls everywhere inspired by cutting draught duty by 1.7 per cent
October 30, 2024 at 2:43 pm
We ask you: Do you have no f**king clue if you’re better off after the budget?
October 30, 2024 at 2:29 pm
Reeves to soften the blow by peppering the Budget with gags
October 30, 2024 at 11:43 am
New Asian colleague on works curry night expected to be a sodding expert
October 30, 2024 at 10:11 am
