Christmassy slush and gush smothers all attempts at comedy in this bland family film about Santa’s musclebound personal security guard

This profoundly depressing and blandly sentimental Christmas comedy for early November stars Dwayne Johnson as Santa’s bodyguard, out to rescue him from kidnappers and so save Christmas.

With an unvarying smirk, Chris Evans co-stars as a roguish professional thief (with an assumed heart of gold) called Jack O’Malley, whose cynical way of life was imprinted on him as a child when he found himself threatened with the naughty list for presuming to question Santa’s existence. Now he is separated from the mother of his child and neglectful of his son.