Words of encouragement, words of courage, wise words… Some of our most influential figures share the advice that’s helped them most

Good advice respects the recipient’s autonomy, offering insights without taking away their sense of agency. It is rooted in empathy, aiming to uplift and empower, rather than control. It aims to provide clarity and direction while encouraging self-reflection, allowing the person to find their own answers. Most importantly, good advice is given at the right time, when the recipient is open and ready to hear it. On point, well-timed advice is one thing, but not all advice is wanted.

Unwelcome advice is a common problem, especially in the age of social media, where everyone feels free to offer their opinions without being asked. This kind can feel patronising. It often implies that the person receiving advice is not capable of handling their own challenges. While unwanted advice can feel intrusive, navigating how to receive it can be just as challenging. One strategy is to recognise that advice often reflects the experiences and perspectives of the person giving it. It may say more about their worldview than it does about you. If you still feel defensive, ask yourself why. Resistance can sometimes mask a fear of vulnerability. For example, do you need to see yourself as someone who already has all the answers? Feeling as though you should already know something can evoke shame, making it hard to accept guidance.