Looking back through her post bag, Observer Magazine’s Philippa Perry answers her readers most commonly asked question: why are other people so awful?

From my many years as a therapist and advice columnist, I’ve started to see clear patterns in the problems that bother my readers the most. And I can confirm that Sartre was right: hell is other people. It’s difficult relationships with those around us that cause the most anguish. It’s such a common theme that I’ve given a lecture on the subject: Why are other people so awful? To help you into the new year, here’s my advice on this most commonly experienced problem.

Struggles in connecting to others – or, more specifically, the tension between wanting connection and feeling disconnected – can manifest in many ways. As well as difficulties in existing relationships, such struggles can also make you feel lonely or alienated.